Ok, here is a story of an irritating interaction I had last week.

I was on my way home from work last Friday and I was going to get ready for my company Christmas party. I realized that I needed to get ones as gambling was involved in the festivities that night and it was already after the bank was closed, so I figured I would take my chances at the neighborhood Plaid Pantry. I had a $50 bill and about $8 in ones. I went in and grabbed a sugar free Red Bull. The guy behind the counter had been on the phone since before I had entered the store. I went up to the counter and was looking around for a lighter. There were none in sight. I was standing right in front of the cashier looking like, well, looking like a person who was LOOKING for something. He didn't even stop talking to ask me what I was looking for. So, I took off down the aisles alone searching, searching, searching... And then I thought, wait a minute...why am I wasting MY precious time searching for something that this guy obviously knows the location of. I was trying to accommodate the dude on his phone call. So I marched back up to the counter and stared at him. He got off the phone and I asked him where the lighters were. This was his response:

"We don't have any. We have some back here. We don't have any Bics. We don't have any cheap ones." Huh? First of all, what do I care if they are Bics? Secondly, a cheap one? How expensive are they? Do I look like I can't afford a lighter? He was acting like he didn't want to sell me one. How much could they be? $30? So I asked, ok, how much are they? He said, "Umm...well, we have one for $1.29, another for $1.39 and another for $1.99, or something like that." Whoa, talk about breaking the bank. So I said, "ok then give me 2" (I was going the big spender angle.) I pulled out my $50 and gave it to him. "I can't take that, " he said. "People have been in here trying to bust out (I can't remember the exact terminology he used, but it was I think some street way of saying passing counterfeit bills) 50's" "What?" I said with a dumbfounded look, "You have got to be kidding me. I just need some ones." The tab was $4 and change. I was irritated and mumbling under my breath as I pulled out my precious ones. I said something to the effect of - I need ones and you are taking them from me. You are not helping me at all.

Needless to say, I was irritated and had not accomplished my goal at all. I went home to get ready. About a half hour later, Joseph arrived and I was telling him how I had no luck getting ones and that I had actually spent some of the ones I had. "It's ok. I got 20 ones," he said, "I stopped by the Plaid Pantry and the cashier was bitching about how everyone wanted ones and that someone was just in there trying to break a $100 bill and get ones."

That little liar. I had a $50. He totally exaggerated. Too funny. Well, I guess by then it was funny.

And no one needs to start harassing me about why I would need a lighter. I have plenty of candles at home...